DOUGHED

 I made bread and tortillas today and after I thought, why not just make dinner too? Everything cooking, was done before noon and I can't tell you how liberating it was. I am cooking dinner early more often. Whenever I make tortillas James steals a ball of dough and pulls out his play dough bucket and plays at the kitchen table. Ashton was so happy to join him. Although, James kept stilling Ashton's ball of dough and combining it with his.

 I ordered us a new mailbox. Nate is always upset when I go cheap. I thought this mailbox is suppose to last us for the next fifty years, I better buy a quality one. When I saw one called "country mailbox" that was more than the rest, I knew it was the right mailbox. It arrived today. I have been giggling all day. IT IS HUGE! Nate says he is going to mount it anyway. I will be giggling every time I go pick up the mail.

SLUSH AND ICE

 Not sure what these two were doing yesterday but they were both having a blast.

They were filling this bucket full of slush ice and carrying behind the garage. I am not sure why. They are two peas in a pod. Natalie is two years younger than Sierra but you wouldn't know it when they get together. They both love doing the same things. They both love to wear boy t-shirts and ponytails and they both prefer to play outside.

 

I went to the doctor yesterday finally. After a solid week of my ear throbbing and oozing puss and blood and not being able to hear a dang thing, I decide it was finally time. He really didn't have much to offer. He just said it will take time. I think trying to be patient with this aliment has not been easy. I feel like half a person and haven't been able to do much of the thing I want to. I read this talk last week and I really loved this simple message.

 

Elder Hales paused for a moment and responded, “When you cannot do what you have always done, then you only do what matters most.”

 

I have been trying to focus on the things that matter most.

 

UNDERWEAR BOY

 He decided he is done with pull ups. He decided he wanted to wear underwear at night too. He hasn't had a single accident. He has woken up to go potty. He was potty trained a year ago but I haven't known how to tackle potty training a boy at night. I tried waking him up before I went to bed but he just melted down. I finally just thought I wouldn't worry about it till he was three. He hit three and he chose to do it on his own. I am so proud of him. He is so proud of himself. I love little boys in underwear. It is so stinking cute and their little bum cheeks are so pinchable.

I MADE IT

 The flooring people are coming tomorrow to repair the floors. I am so grateful but I have been so worried about them coming. I had a lot to accomplish and no energy or desire. I almost broke down this afternoon knowing all I had to do. I had no idea how I was going to get it done, especially with a clingy baby. I should of worried less, story of my life. It all worked out. I got everything done, including the laundry.

 

I love my laundry room. It is what makes it possible to live in such a small space. I have one drawer for everyone. I just fold into the drawer. They take their clothes to their room when the drawer is full.

 

Oh, and in my cleaning I came across this great poem by Sierra.

I love it.

A BETTER DAY

 I can't hear but my ears don't hurt. I call that a win.

Aston had a fever again today. Nate wants to know why we can't get well. I am not sure.

This boy is substantially better. HALLELUJAH!

I watched Temple Grandin today. I loved it. You got to do something to pass the time when you have zero energy and a sick baby that just wants to be held.

JANUARY WE HAVE NOT BEEN FRIENDS...

January,

 

We are not friends. I finally thought last night would be the beginning of the end of all my sickness and sleepless nights. I went to bed and slept till four in the morning. It was a beautiful thing until I had a horrible dream about jabbing a cotton swab over and over as hard as I could in my ear. Of course I wasn't jamming a cotton swab in my ear, I was having a massive ear infection. I couldn't sleep, I was in so much pain. I watched a show on Amazon Prime called Just add Magic. It was really good and distracted me from the pain. A great series for the whole family to watch! Then around eight o'clock my ear drum ruptured. It gave me a lot of relief but I feel like I am walking in a haze and it still hurts a lot. Like, a lot, a lot. I have to say I would rather give birth than have an earache. My ear has been oozing all day. I just want to be whole again. I am looking forward to February. I am sorry January, but I am going to happy to say goodbye to you.

 

 

Lisa 

While my earache was keeping my occupied, my boys found their own way to occupy themselves.

HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY SON!

 He is three! I can't believe how fast he has grown. I swear he has grown faster than my other two. I know that isn't possible, but I swear it is true. He grows by leaps and bounds every day. He is so fun to have around, most of the time. He loves to help me with everything I am doing, cooking or cleaning. He is always right by my side. I have often turned around quickly to grab something and knocked him over. I have to remind myself that he is always there. He is my shadow.

 

He loves to growl when he is mad and his favorite phrase is. "I going killed you!" When he is really angry. I must confess playing cowboys with him and pretend guns has lead to that phrase. My fault.

 

He loves his remote control car. He sleeps with it. Hilarious.

 

He loves to play with his brother Ash. He will knock him on his bum if he thinks he is looking at him wrong. Not sure where that comes from. Ashton will start to cry and I will look over and say, "James, did you push Ashton." He will say between clinched teeth, "He'd was looking at me."

 

His favorite movie is Winnie the Pooh and favorite TV series is Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood. He will sing me songs from the series when it is appropriate. The other day I was going to drop him off at my friend Lilly's for a bit and as I went to leave he said, "I will stay with Lilly, because grown ups come back." He sang the last part. He sometimes sings it to me when I drop him off at nursery.

 

He loves to be read to and will sit for hours and let me read to him.

 

I love him to bits and pieces.

 

 

I burnt his birthday cake, badly. I cut off the top of the cake and turned the cake into cake balls. Nate asked why we were eating play dough for James's birthday but then ate three. I guess they were okay.

FEVER

All night long I was up with this little one, he had a high fever. He has been fighting a cough and runny nose like James and I, but he has been so happy you couldn't tell he was sick. Then yesterday he crawled up to me and just laid down on my chest. I was watching Winnie the Pooh with James. He snuggled close and began to breath heavy. A few minutes later his body temperature began to rise. Poor baby, here we go again. When the baby is sick you worry more and it breaks your heart more. I brought his bed into the family room and slept on the couch again. At one point he fell asleep cuddled up under my arm. My arm started to go numb, I thought I could gently move it out from under this head but I am not that good. Even after ten years, almost eleven, of being a parent. He started to scream and scream and scream for twenty minutes. I felt bad and vowed not to try and move my arm next time.

 

I hoping tonight I will get to sleep in my own bed. We will see.



 



HAPPY SUNDAY

 

Dad and the girls went to church. Mom and the boys stayed home. We will be happy when we are better and we are all together on one of the back pews. Until then I will be watching this. Have a beautiful Sabbath and may it bring us all closer to Christ.

 

 

 

 

 

HOMEMAKER

I believe I was always meant to be a homemaker. Something in my soul just loves it. I love cleaning and making beautiful meals and taking care of my babies. Yesterday was Saturday and I spent the day cleaning and listening to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir while my babies played on the floor. (I was in the mood to listen to something uplifting. I often am in the mood to listen to something that makes me want to dance but today I was feeling a little reflective.) I was going to take them upstairs and help them clean the upstairs after I was done downstairs but by the time I got the downstairs done, there was grocery shopping, and baths, and dinner, and bedtime. If I could have a week off of being a mom I would spend it organizing, cleaning and touching up my home. (Have I mentioned that I love my home.) I don't have a week off. As much as I love being a homemaker, I hate how my efforts are undone in seconds, but that is another battle I am working on.

 

My friend once said that you can tell if you are a good mother if your kids are always underfoot. They want to be near you. Yesterday it warmed my heart and made me laugh that my children would rather sit on the cold, hard, partially wet floor than on the carpet because it was where I was. I told them they were making it difficult to mop so they repositioned themselves on the edge of the kitchen floor. They could have gone upstairs to a room full of toys. What is a room full of toys compared with a mother?

WE ARE JUST GOING WITH IT...

 James found his birthday presents and opened all of them, when I was cleaning the kitchen. (Small house problems.) When a boy has been as sick as he has and he finds something that puts a smile on his face, you just go with it. (P.S. I have never seen that smile before. Silly boy. He was really, really happy.)

This girl has been spending her evenings writing a chapter book. I haven't read it yet. She is an amazing writer. (Notice the scrunchie? I am trying to let her be her own person but it is really hard. That thing is in every picture and every video, I dare you to thumb back through and check it out. Mom control, let it go.) 

DAY FIVE of SICK

I haven't slept since Monday. James has been so sick. He can't sleep because he is sick, so he just wants to give his mother tasks all night. Mommy, you get me a drink. Mommy, you get me a tissue. Help me blowed my nose. Mommy, it's ouchie. Mommy, I need go potty. Mommy, turned on the light. Mommy, mommy, mommy. I would barely fall asleep and he would start it up again. I can't begin to tell you how exhausted I have been. When I was a young mother I use to scream and cry and say, "I quit. I can't do this anymore. I am so tired." I would get borderline hysterical. Then things would get worse. I am older and with age sometimes comes wisdom. I have learned through the scriptures the greatest thing the Savior had to learn was who He really was. He had to discover his own divinity. We all are on a mission to do the same. We are capable of extraordinary things. We can do all things through Christ. The other night as I neared my breaking point, I kept saying, it will all work out. I will get sleep eventually. I can do all things through Christ. Everything felt manageable and peaceful. I didn't get anymore sleep even through I prayed for it but I did receive the strength I needed.

I got up yesterday so sick but started to clean. My kitchen floor, pictured above, has failed. It is coming up all over the place. The problem has been going on since August. The company that installed it was suppose to come and fix it on Friday, today. I was trying to catch up on the laundry and clean everything. Miraculously, I had the energy and desire but I believe that was a tender mercy. I was making okay time and then the boys both fell asleep, so I decided to take a nap. When I woke up I felt like I had been hit by a truck. It was a tender mercy that the flooring guy got sick too, he won't make it out till next week. I was hoping something like that would happen. I was in disbelief when I got the voicemail. (I didn't think I should cancel because this problem has been going on since August.) I didn't know what I was going to do with our sick selves why they ripped up the flooring. I felt so blessed that I didn't have to worry about it. It all worked out. Feeling blessed.

P.S. I love the above picture. Ashton got into the drawer and pulled out his bottle and put the lid on it and tried to drink from it. I have been giving him chocolate milk in his bottle lately, I know, but he loves it. He thought he would help himself and was awfully disappointed when it didn't work.

 

Egg soup was for lunch. My mother use to make it for us all time when we were little and got sick. I think it is so soul satisfying. It is just broken spaghetti noodles, chicken bouillon, eggs. I put a little garlic in ours just to help fight our illness. James and Ashton ate their whole bowl, so success.

MY BABY IS 1!

 The more children I have the faster time goes. You can see the forward thrust of time in them. I love watching them grow and having two boys two years apart has been challenging but so beautiful. I love my Ashton. He is such a joy. He is always happy. He brings a light and life into our home that fills me. I want to eat up his little smile all day. He has it on all the time, except when he is sick or teething. He was doing both at Christmas. My family didn't get to meet the real Ashton over Christmas and it kind of makes me sad. He has been sick like his brother the past few days but unlike his brother he has been all smiles. Forgive the dirty nose pictures. I had a box of tissues next to me and was blowing his nose every few minutes, but it didn't help. Poor baby.

 

He has started walking. He walks from one thing to the next. He is always so proud of himself that giant grin fills his face. He is into everything just like James and I can't turn my head for a minute without a mess. I love every stinking ounce of him. Happy Birthday baby boy!

Not sure what happened to my cake. I put the frosting on hot, maybe that was it, but the thing just fell apart. Sierra chose his cake because he couldn't. He enjoyed it because chocolate is his favorite but that frosting was a bit much. It looks sad but is so happy tasting. He only wanted cake when he saw it. He didn't eat dinner and then was up till midnight with a tummy ache, bad mommy.