I had a few more ministering interviews to do. I left the kids home on Sunday to put up the tree. They insisted it was a Sunday activity because Christmas is all about the Savior. I concurred. When I got back two hours later the tree wasn't up and I had pine needles all over the house. The house was a wreck from being gone all weekend and everyone was hungry. I should have listened to the Spirit as He encouraged me to forgo the ministering interviews and spend the evening with my kids putting together the tree. When I saw the disaster I lost it, I started vacuuming and yelling about how much I hate Christmas. I hate Christmas. It is the worst holiday. I hate Christmas decor and buying Christmas presents. My poor babies. I think Madison left in tears. I kept having the words from a favorite church video of my youth go through my head, "Are you giving the least to those who matter most or are you sharing your best with those who really aren't that close? Well, its time to turn around and find out where your greatest joys are found." I often feel abandoned and overwhelmed in my efforts. I don't know how to suppress my frustration and just love. Certainly, I would have had a better evening if I had of listened to the Spirit.
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