PREGNANT BRAIN

 

Yesterday, I felt like fool. I know pregnancy brain is a thing because no one can be as stupid as I was yesterday. Laura, Madison's primary teacher was pregnant and having a baby girl. I was so sad I missed her baby shower. Sierra's birthday was on the same day. So, I told her let me make it up to you and take pictures of your baby in the hospital, those are my favorite pictures of James. She said she would like that. After multiple attempts to schedule on Wednesday, I finally was able to set them up for Thursday. I set up the time at 10:00am. I don't know what happened to my oven clock, the clock my life runs off of but it was set for an hour earlier. When I dropped my kids off at a friends it was 11:00. My friend said to be back by 12:20 because she had to take her son to preschool. I told her it wouldn't be a problem, thinking I had two hours. When I got to the hospital it was 11:20. I called Laura and apologized. I called Heather and apologized and told her there wasn't a way I could be back by 12:20. I didn't realize while I was taking picture I had missed taking Madison to Kindergarten.

 

So, we called up a friend and played on the playground at McDonalds and ate sundae's, what else were we going to do?

After we picked up Sierra from school we went out to our little paradise. Luckily, I remembered that my friend Kim was dropping off her geese. I called and they were on their way.  I have to chalk it up to inspiration because my mind is obviously not that efficient lately.

When I tell James to give me a cheese, he bats his eyes. You can see it in the first picture and in the last picture. He cracks me up. He was my bright spot yesterday.

ZOE

Madison has amazing hair. Today she was getting ready to leave the house and I had to snap a picture. Photography is hard for me. I want real pictures but I also want beautiful pictures and unless you have better equipment than I, real is just real. Here is a real moment in our dark basement, when earlier this morning the dishwasher stopped working and so I had to wash the dishes by hand. Madison's favorite place to eat is on the bar. She is technically in the kitchen, which is the only place she is allowed to eat and yet she still has full view of the television.

My friend Tiffany asked me to take pictures of her baby girl. She turned one a few months ago. I was so happy to do it. I would love to run my own photography business someday. I love pictures. I love taking them. I have to pull them up on my computer and enjoy them right after I get back from taking them. I am a little obsessive.

But this is what stops me, the dentist is never around, I mean never. I would have to higher a babysitter and its not always easy to get a babysitter. Anyway, quickly this thing I love becomes something that takes over my life. The thing I value the most, like this little munchkin gets neglected and then...... it isn't worth it anymore. My time will come.

Isn't he the cat's meow! Oh, I just love eating him up. I went to Relief Society tonight. He played in the nursery when I went to pick him up he wouldn't let go of his baby doll. I let him bring it home. My girls kept freaking out, "He is stealing the baby doll mommy!" He wouldn't let it go and I figure we can just return it on Sunday. He loves babies. I hope so because we are going to have one pretty soon.

Tiffany moved her from Ogden a few months ago. Her husband is the one who is obsessive about fly fishing and introduced himself as, "You will never find anyone more obsessed than me about fly fishing." The ward giggled. He met Nate. We have to be friends. Fisherman's wives must stick together.

Here is her precious daughter. Cutest little girl ever!

WEDNESDAY's

I know. I know. Madison's underwear is showing. I am bummed because these are the cutest pictures ever. I asked her if it was okay if I posted the pictures anyway. She said, Yes, it is so funny! My Madison. I wanted to post them to Facebook..... darn. I don't know why I didn't catch it.

I have loved hearing about kindergarten drama lately. I miss all of Sierra's updates on all her classmates. I can't remember when she stopped telling me the detail of everyone's lives. I miss it. Madison said Luciana said her Mom got hauled off to jail the other day. Then she told me how Dominique can't keep his hands to himself so he is always getting in trouble. Then she said yesterday Dominique broke his arm. Karma... maybe. Hilarious. McKenzie came over to me during art heritage and said, "Is that girl with the long blonde hair your daughter?" I said, "Yes!" She said, "The other day she hit me for no good reason." I said, "If Madison hit you then there was a reason." McKenzie looked me in the eye and said, "Nope, no good reason." I asked Madison about hitting McKenzie she looked at me incredulously and said, "I have never hit anyone." I believe her. I mean we are talking about Madison, there isn't a mean bone in that girls body.

Anyway, we are grateful for sweet friends. The girls love playing with these girls. They are sisters too.

MULTIPLICATION

I thought that teaching my child how to go potty was the hardest thing I would have to do. Then I had to teach her how to read, which was brain numbing and ridiculously hard. Surprisingly, she in now a reader. When I go in her room late at night, she is usually reading. It makes me so happy. I never thought she would enjoy reading. She does now. I am grateful every day.

Now onto the next hurdle, multiplication. It has been ridiculously long hours. If anyone has any tricks, besides flash cards and on-line games, I am ready and willing to listen. She doesn't like doing it and frankly neither do I but I don't want her counting fingers in high school, so we will plug along.

I have been thinking a lot about boy names this morning, which I haven't really done because all of our children's names have been compromises and I don't want to set my heart on anything, but here I go again. I have looked at the top names for 2013. Surprisingly, my nephew Leo's names was 75. I didn't think he would even make the top 1,000 names. There was nothing on the list that stood out to me.

I am not into different names, even though I wanted to name Madison, Ember.

I logged onto Nate and I's family history and these are the names that jumped out at me. I know some of them make the top 2013 names list but maybe because I felt a connection to the names they made the list.

First Names
Charles
Maxwell
Samuel
Jefferie
Benjamin Colton
Thurston
Henry
Nicolas
Alexander
Peder
Lage
Axel

Middle Names
William
Benjamin
Michael
Spencer

Yes, all of these names were either in Nate's family line or my line. I love Maxwell and Lage. We will see what Nate thinks. I told him the other day I liked the name Lucas and he wouldn't give me a nay or a yeah on it. Then a few days later he said, "I like Lucas!" I said, "You do?" He said, "Yes, because when he grows up I can say, Luke, I am your father!" Then he laughed and laughed and said, "I am not naming my son Lucas."

Nate you make me giggle but naming our children is almost as difficult as teaching our daughter multiplication.

CORN

My friend Kay vacuum sealed corn for her son. He wasn't able to come pick it up, so she gave it to us. By the time we got the corn the seal had been compromised. I put the corn in the storage room and waited until Monday. We broke open all the packages of corn and cut the corn from the cob, cooked it for a few minutes and then froze it. We have about twenty quart bags of corn now. Might I add, fresh corn. Yummy. We will be using it in soups and for a side for a couple of months.

My favorite part about doing corn was my sweet Madison. She hung out with me for two hours straight and shucked corn for me. She never stopped and never complained. I wouldn't have gotten it done without her. Even James chipped in and you can see the cob he just finished on the table. It was covered in silk but it was perfect because he did it all by himself. I usually rush about my tasks from one to the next. I don't include my kids because it is faster and less of a hassle to do it by myself. I don't think this makes me a good mom. Yesterday, I felt like a really good mom.

Madison also helped me do peaches for an hour the other night. She put the peaches in the jar because her hands are tiny and she can arrange them prettily. She was a great help.

Earlier that morning we were going through tutorials trying to find a good hairstyle. We chose this one. When I was done she started giggling like only Madison can. She couldn't stop. She said, "Look at my ears they poke out like an elf. We should call this the elf hair." She kept giggling and giggling and saying, "I'm an elf."

SUNDAY

Daddy was sick again this Sunday. I loaded up the kids and took them to church. I wrestled James until after the sacrament and then I sat in the hall with him. I left the girls in the chapel next to a friend. I pray they were good for her. Sunday's are difficult. I don't know what I am going to do in four months when I have one more to tackle. I have managed well so far but I think one more will put me over the top. I don't think my third was a hard transition because there is such a huge gap between Madison and James. I think it might be number four that breaks me. We will see. I might be bawling in the mothers lounge with my toddler and my new born. If I am missing, come check on me.

Why do I go to church when all I do is wrestle children and live in the mother's lounge? I tell my girls every Sunday, because we are McKnight's and we go to church. Even when it is hard, we go to church Even when we don't want to, we go to church. We renew our covenants with our Heavenly Father. We are forgiven of our sins. We rededicate ourselves to our Savior for another week. I feel better when I go to church. I feel happier. I know my example it monumental and the choices I make today will impact tomorrow and year after that and the year after that.  My choices will be their choices and I want them to go to church every Sunday because I know they will feel happier too.

We were so happy to be invited over to Lily's for dinner on Sunday. It was her son Bradley's sixteenth birthday. They invited fifty people over. I heard someone say, "Well, her house can hold us." It can. She just finished building her dream home. I love Lily, she is such a gracious host. I know everyone who came through her door felt loved. I told Sierra, "If you go outside, you can't come back in because I don't want you trailing dirt." Lily overheard me and said, "She is fine Lisa, I don't care."

 

I accidently showed up an hour early. Pregnant brain. I thought it was so sweet of Jason, Lily's husband to say as I was leaving, "Lisa, thank you so much for coming early and helping us get things put together." Not acknowledging that it was a lapse in brain function.  

I often lament the fact that I only have prime lens because in small quarters I can capture people, but not groups. My camera doesn't express the immense party Lily had going on in her home.

 



CAR

Dad is tired of his boy playing with dolls and hauling around princess blankets. I asked him what he expected when he is with us twenty-four seven and we are girls. I said if he wanted him to be a boy he would have to teach him. I guess Saturday he reached his limit because he disappeared most of the morning and came back with this and a blanket that I am pretty sure he picked up at Cabelas. It is super soft and has a giant owl on it. James loves his car and he learned a new word....car. He says it all day long. He is content to just sit in it and climb in and out of it. He does like it when someone is willing to push him. This morning we heard his daddy pushing him around the living room. He loved that. Christmas three months early at the McKnight house. Spoiled boy!

ROLLARBLADING

Sierra loves my rollerblades. Madison does to. I wonder if the wider span of the wheels lends to better stability. Either way it makes me giggle because they are monstrously huge on both of them. This morning they both headed out to roller blade, and James would not be left out when he heard the door shut. He cried until I got dressed and took him outside. Poor boy, doesn't get near enough outdoor time. Again, I can't wait until we move.

Sierra found this tiny caterpillar. She carried it around on the strings of her jacket as she rode around. She said as she picked it up she had to give herself a pep talk about being brave. She use to want to be an entomologist but then a few years ago she became deathly afraid of bugs. Crazy afraid of bugs! She is working on being courageous.

Madison was roller blading around and begging me to hold her hand so she would have more stability. James was ripping apart the Whiteheads flowers and sidewalk lights. When I told him to stop he yelled back at me. Yelling back and hitting when he is upset is a new thing but his anger only comes in spurts and doesn't last, so I find it almost comical. I have to put on my stern face and say, "James don't talk to your mommy like that." When he hits I have to hold his hands for a few minutes and encourage him to use his hands to love his mommy. He is generally a sweet boy. He just doesn't like to be told what to do. I guess all of us could fit into that category at one time or another. I have been studying humility and how important it is our life. Even at thirty-five I have a long ways to go.

OUR HOUSE BUT NOT OUT HOME..... YET.

Sierra asks every day when we are moving. I wish I had a solid answer for her. We didn't think this hundred year old home with crooked floors was worth going into debt for. We have just been doing a piece at a time when we can afford it and when we have time.  It has taken longer than we wanted it to and it will be longer still.

 

However, it is still our happy place. We stop by after school a couple of times a week. We run and play. The girls love on their fifteen pets. Yes, I said fifteen pets. I didn't realize it was so many either. Sierra was the first to count them all. Ten chickens, three geese, two cats and soon to be two more geese. I have no idea what we are thinking. Nate has plans to raise bees in the spring and sheep. I am suppose to research which bred of sheep we want to raise. I have no idea where to start.

 

Why do we need two more geese? We don't. A friend has been raising two in her back yard since Mother's Day. They are too big for her backyard, so where else do you send massive geese when they get too big. Why, to a farm with a pond of course.

 

Hopefully, they won't be as rascally and naughty as the three we already own. The ugly one is called Afro-Man. The girls named him. He's a mean little sucker. He pinned Madison to the hen house and bite her thighs over and over again on Monday. She started screaming and Nate went running. He must have kicked that bird twelve feet or more. When his foot hit its backside white feathers exploded into the air. It was quite a sight. Afro-man kept his distance today but normally all three of them march over to us the minute they see the car pull up. They honk as they march and the minute they get close to Madison or James they attack. Madison has gotten to the point where she won't walk around on the property alone. When she hears them honking she runs for the car.

Sierra, Madison, and James love to walk all over the property and collect little things they find. They fill nets or whatever they have. This is what they found on Monday. James found the net and was sifting through all the cool things they have found. 

Sierra spent a good long while pulling her brother and sister around the property in this wagon today. James was giggling out loud. I love it when they play well together.

Our home..... some day.

ELSA GIRL

Madison is my girly-girl. She loves to get dressed up and she loves having her hair done. I love it. She loves to go onto pinterest and pick out hairdos for school. It is her favorite thing. When I get it really close to what she envisions she will tell me all the way to school how her friends are going to love her hair and how they will want to sit by her so they can get a better look. She has fairly thick hair for such a little girl and it is longer, so we can do almost anything to it. She loves it. We used this tutorial. It was a look more intense than I originally thought. I thought I can French braid no problem. There is a little more to it than that. She loved her Elsa Hair. I should start documenting her cool hairdos. She is really into it.

James saw his sister getting her picture and insisted I take his picture. He is my favorite thing. He is into everything which I can't lie is a bit of trial but other than that he is heaven sent. He is just such a happy little man. His favorite thing to do is still cook. He begs me to cook every day. He has a friend who has a little kitchen and a bucket of food and play kitchen items. He would live there if he could. Surprisingly we don't have any toys like it. Would it be bad if we bought him a play kitchen for Christmas? He would be so happy. His other favorite thing is one of Madison's baby dolls. It is only one particular baby. If he sees anyone else holding it he cries and begs for it. Sadly, it is Madison's favorite baby doll and so they fight a lot over it. Nate would kill me if I got him a baby doll for Christmas, but boys become daddies right? He will be the best daddy ever. I could eat him up!