ME EXPOSED

I was tagged. I am suppose to write some honest things about myself. Although, I enjoy reading these things, I hate writing them. However, despite the fact that I know I have several faithful readers that just don't comment, I love that my Aunt Caroline does comment. Since she takes the time to do that for me, I will do this for her. No one has to read this and I would recommend you don't.

1. My dream home is a rustic cabin, with exposed beams in the ceiling, an old leather couch, and a handmade patchwork blanket on each bed. The backyard will consist of a tire swing and a huge garden. There maybe a cow and a few chickens back there too some day. (I have a deep detest for all things animal but I love self-reliance and I know I can't live without milk and eggs. Someday the thing I detest and the thing I love may collide.)

2. I love recycled items. I love taking something useless and making it useful again. I turn old t-shirts that still have a lot of life left in them into dresses or t-shirts for my girls. I admire people that also follow the the motto, "Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without."

3. I have no strong attachments to things. I am not sure why. Also, I disdain clutter. I give or throw things away the minute I am no longer using it or it no longer serves a purpose. When we moved to Pittsburgh we didn't bring a Uhaul, we just got rid of everything and left. When we move from Pittsburgh back West we will do the same thing again. It is kind of liberating to me.

4. I am afraid of over-the-counter drugs and prescription drugs. I don't know whether this comes from the way I was raised or whether it is of my own creation, but it is true. I have a small bottle of Tylenol and some baby's Tylenol in my medicine cabinet right now and that is it. I also don't believe in herbs or medicinal remedies, maybe that is because of the person I married to or it is of my own creation, but it is true. (I know crazy.)We use Tylenol sparingly and try to eat a lot of fruits and vegetables and of course some herbs in my cooking, that is my health recipe for life.

5. I love fashion. I admire people with unique styles. I admire people that have a look. My look currently is starved, but I will feed it someday. Right now I feel like a walking candidate for "What not to Wear." I love three inch heels and even though they kill my feet and are unpractical for toting two little girls, I wear them often. I love high heels. I think that shoes are a great accessory and the only sexy thing you should wear in public.

6. I love to write. Mostly, I write children's stories. I write in my journal fairly frequently. I take the time to write at least a page; between my blog, my journal, or my scripture journal, once a day. Yes, I keep a journal other than my blog because somethings are just too private to share in a public forum. I think those words are the most important to write. (My blog is more like a digital scrap book.)

7. I hate reading. I have never liked it. I was really bored when I was twenty and went and got my first library card. My father was beyond shocked. (He is a lover of books.) I am really bored again and have been reading some books my mother-in-law sent me for Christmas. My husband said in disbelief, "You are reading, honey. Good job." When I do read it befuddles me to think any author can say more in 600 pages than they should have fit into 300 pages. Even if I start a book if I hit page 300 and you aren't sucking me in with every word, I probably will walk away and never look back, which leads to number eight. (However, I did read The Undaunted all 802 pages. I am reading Jacob Hamblin's bibliography, which I have really enjoyed, but I have hit page 300, so it could go either way at this point.)

8. I don't have to see the ending of movies, television programs, or finish a book. I feel perfectly content not seeing the ending of things. I never come back to a movie, or any television program, and restart it from the places I have missed if I am interrupted halfway through. If anything bores me in the slightest or feels like it is wasting my time, I will just leave midway through.

9. If you are still reading you deserve something good. The bottoms of my feet are filled with rock hard calluses. You could take a chisel to these babies.

I heard a story once, from a friend, that had a friend, who's husband's feet were nasty. They were so filled with broken calluses that when his callused feet rubbed across the sheets they tore them. I think I gave a shocked look of disbelief, and said, no. However, that is me. I did that to a pair of sheets. Oh, yes I did.

Once my sister came into town. I told her about my problem. She took me to the store. We walked down the foot care isle. I picked up a tool up. I said, "How 'bout this one." She said, "Lisa, that is a cheese grater. I would never touch that to my foot." Well after all the products we bought didn't work I went back and bought the cheese grater. Didn't make a dent in the problem.

That's why you keep the three inch heels on and never take them off because beneath those leather boots is something mind blowing gross. Nate is constantly after me to go get a pedicure but I won't because I can't let anyone fix it. I would be too embarrassed to watch someone else chisel away. Plus, I don't want to spend money on something so frivolous, which leads to number ten. (Which is less funny so you can stop here if you want.)

10. I hate debt. If I borrow something I cannot feel at peace until it is returned. This is how ridiculous it is, I have a book I borrowed from a girl six years ago. I can't throw it away because it isn't mine. I can't keep it because every time I look at it I feel guilty for not returning it, and I can't return it because I can't remember her name, first or last. When I bought my first car I would put every spare penny into paying off the balance. When other girls were buying clothes and paying the minimum balance on their cars, I was doubling the payments on mine and forgoing clothes. It wasn't that I didn't like nice thing, it was just that in my mind I was spending someone elses money until the debt was repaid. Since we began this venture most of our life has been on loans and therefore in my mind there has been no room for the frivolous. I calculate and recalculate how much we own on our loans and how fast I want to pay to them off. (That may have been less funny, so I will go on.)

11. I was a little actress as a child. I love to read to my girls. I want them to love to read. (Weird I know. I didn't say reading doesn't have its virtues I just said I don't like it.) So, when I read to my girls I do all the voices. I have on occasion been known to read the Bernstein Bears in opera. My favorite voice to do is the witches voices. I think I am pretty good at impersonating a witch. (You would be surprised at how many witches there are in children's books.) However, one day Sierra came to me and said, "Mom I had a bad dream last night. I called my grandma and she answered the phone like this." Then she said in the raspiest witches voice, "Hello Sierra." It sent chills up my spine. I have tried to refrain from speaking in that voice since. (Maybe that turned into a downer too. Oh, well I filled my obligation and hey I gave you the callused feet, so laugh on that one for a while.)